No idea is a frequently reproduced as that of originality…

Es wird keine Vorstellung so oft reproduziert wie die der originalitat…

.... Just as reproduction is impossible without the original, so does the original imply the possibility of reproduction.

…. Wie Reproduktion nicht möglich ist ohne original, so impliziert das original die moglichkeit zur Reproduktion.

Arrest for: Grand Theft Audio

Question

Country : Pennsylvania : I am 16 years old and legally emancipated. I’m due to be arrested for charges of Grand Theft Audio, Giving a False Statement, and possible DUI. I have no criminal record. What are my options?

If I am tried as an adult what would the typical sentence be?

What would it be if I was charged as a minor?

Is a shock camp an option?

Answer

Make sure you get counsel (or at least the public defender) to try to keep this off your record eventually--jail time is probably not likely if your record is clear now. But having that arrest and/or a conviction on your record will make job-hunting etc. more difficult. Often this could be negotiated down to some kind of court supervision etc.

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Grand Theft Audio

Like we give a damn

If you can't be a

shining example, then

serve as a horrible

warning.

The Max Headroom Broadcast Intrusion

What it was-

This was a television broadcast interruption, breaking into WGN-TV and WTTW on November 22, 1987. The only way to sum this up in a single sentence is to say that a man was dressed as Max Headroom and crazy in ways most crazy people can only longingly aspire to.

For those not familiar with him because you don't remember (or want to remember) the 80s, Max Headroom was a CGI character with a distorted, electronic, stuttering voice in front of a background that was constantly moving in a dizzying display of cheapness. He did Coca-Cola ads and even had his own TV show back in the 80s,

--It was the 80s; you had to be there--.

As strange as that may sound to our sophisticated post-millennium ears, the intruder somehow made all this even more bizarre and infinitely creepier.

The two stations, WGN-TV and WTTW, were interrupted within two hours. The first, the intruder interrupted the WGN nine o'clock news to announce to the world he had, well, let’s just say, a screw loose.

Unfortunately for him, there was only a buzzing noise accompanying the video. Then on the PBS station WTTW, Doctor Who was interrupted by the same video, though this time with audio. And it went for a horrifying minute and a half.

The YouTube clip above has subtitles, but they aren't very helpful. Here's a play by play, though it's about as useful as someone turning to you and explaining that the strange man with the aluminium helmet, on the subway is farting in Morse code without mentioning the important detail of why.

Though how this nut-job managed even that has to leave you scratching your head, considering that he used his precious seconds with an audience to utter such thought-provoking lines as "I stole CBS!" and "I made a giant masterpiece for all the greatest world newspaper nerds." And he finishes by bending over and allowing a girl to spank his naked ass with a fly swatter, screeching that someone was coming to get him.

A high-tech stunt from the dark side?

Up until this point we all thought it was only comic-book baddies and Bond villains who could broadcast there rantings to the world by overrunning all terrestrial TVs, now we are not so sure, but maybe now we should also worry about who really controls the buttons for all those Nukes. Sleep easy. . . . !

The Wow! Signal

What is it?

This broadcast rivals or even surpasses the Max Headroom one in mysteriousness. It is so mysterious; in fact, they were forced to go with this ridiculous name.

This was a radio signal that was picked up at The Big Ear radio telescope.

Yes, this one comes from space.

Big Ear used numbers, from zero to 10, to document how far above the useless background noise any signals went. In a comically childish system, the eggheads ran out of fingers and had to use toes, so they added letters A-Z on top of the numbers.

The Wow! Signal was "6EQUJ5" meaning it began at a scale of six, crept up to the beginning of the letter threshold, and then jumped to Q and then as far as U before fading gradually.

All of this happened over 37 seconds, and all of this from a seemingly empty point in space. Mind-bogglingly it came from a non-terrestrial and non-solar system source. It was a signal shot to Earth from one of the emptiest places imaginable, and something from that place somehow sent it to us.

Return address.

It's called the "Wow" signal because the man who found it was so amazed by it that he circled it and wrote "Wow" on the side, which for posterity was probably a little better than "HOLY FUCKING MOTHER OF COCK OF SHIT!LOOK AT DAT"

So what’s the big deal?

It could be, as the killjoys at Wikipedia suggest, interstellar scintillation of a weaker continuous signal.

If that statement did little more than sexually excite you, then all you need to know is that a continuous signal is far less remarkable, and what they picked up might have been a weak, continuous signal that gained strength for a short time.

However, it's a mysterious signal from space that follows a very calculated system, turning off, and then turning on. That... really doesn’t happen unless you have a finger (or something) on a switch.

The signal had the trademark of an artificially produced interstellar broadcast. How did they broadcast it from a point in space where there are no planets and there are no solar systems? Well, the only explanation would logically be a spaceship.

The guy who found the signal in the first place tried to deny it was extraterrestrial life; that it was just something from Earth reflected off of space debris, but there are some problems with that idea.

If it was from Earth, the reflector would have to have had all sorts of unrealistic (and a little too complicated) requirements for the nature of the signal. For once the explanation that there's an alien craft beaming signals is more logically sound than the tried and true "space debris" argument.

The Backward Music Station

What is it?

The "Backward Music Station" doesn't actually play backward music, although we here at Grand Theft Audio Broadcasting Corporation Head-quarters (G.T.A.B.C.H.Q) are working on that idea. That's just what they call it.

What it is broadcasting instead is something that sounds like it comes from the bowels of Hell itself:

A high-pitched unnerving grinding groaner, with some banging thrown in just to make it sound a tad creepier. This video says it was recorded in 2004 and claims the signal had since gone dormant, but there are other recordings claiming to be as recent as September of 2009.