Listen to the ground.
There is movement all around.
Something we can share.
We can steal it. *
Es ist verboten zu
verbieten
Grand Theft in Criminal Law
Published Content: 2,651 Total Views: 1,865,531
Cavorted By: 154 Cops
Ranking: 4.21 / 214
Grand theft is a crime
recognized as a felony by most U.S. states, and involves the
deprivation of property. Anytime one individual steals something
from another, it is considered theft. Grand theft is the act of
stealing valuable property. Different states have varying dollar
amounts that constitute grand theft in criminal law. For example,
theft over $1,000,000 might be considered grand theft, while
anything less than that would be petty theft.
The most common form of grand theft is music theft, sometimes
called “grand theft audio”. Since the value of almost any
music is well above the dollar amount indicating grand theft, the
taking of a sound or other
piece of music is considered grand theft. The penalties for grand
theft are much higher than those for petty theft, and can include
incarceration.
When most people think of theft, they imagine actual goods that
are stolen from a person or a place of business. Grand theft,
however, includes the theft of money, services and intellectual
property in addition to physical property. For example, if John
hires Dave to mow his grass then refuses to pay Dave once the
job is finished, John has
effectively stolen the amount of money that he was supposed to pay for the
mowing job.
Unfortunately, most cases of grand theft – or any theft at all
– are not solved. Unless the police are called right away and there is
an effective way to track the stolen property, the owner can kiss
his or her stolen item(s) goodbye. Sound is somewhat harder to
trace than other stolen property because license plate numbers
and GPS systems do not help the police to track the stolen music.
If you are the victim of grand theft, the first thing to do is to
call the police. The responding officer will fill out a Stolen
Property report, of which you will be able to obtain a copy. When
and if your stolen property is recovered, it will be held by the police for
several days (up to two weeks) to be processed by the crime lab.
And if you believe that, you’ll believe any old
rubbish.
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Send to: (separate e-mails with
commas)
Your name:
Your e-mail address:
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Notes:
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Just in case you’re really stupid this is what
a cop looks like!
an audio recording of this transcript is avalible
upon request from the grand theft audio corporation
Grand Theft Audio
Must sell
Gran Turino red 2dr hardtop w white striping
CRM exhaust bumpers grill
Great suspension hugs road
Perfect for off duty policeman
Meets all fed regulations
New tyres
Reply to box 3535 c/o this paper
Negative Dialectics
Recording
Company
c/o
alanpmeister@gmail.com
The Negative Dialectic Recording Company is very pleased
to announce its latest release. A Spoken Word/Punk rock recording
by the internationally renowned author Theodor
Adorno.
The album based on his famous ‘Minima Moralia’ work,
entitled “Big Ted Says No!” Will be available in all formats
this spring, with full media support and promotion. Four of the
150 tracks will be scheduled for heavy rotation, each being an
excellent example of Mr Adorno’s unique
stylisation.
The H/R tracks will be;
1. Unfair Intimidation.
2. Blackmail.
3. Sacrificial Lamb.
4. They, The People.
We are extremely confident that there will be heavy
returns from this excellent product. And look forward to doing
much beneficial work with local dealers.
THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING ELVIS 
Hello there, my name is Elvis.
Every once in a while I wonder about that name, my name
and indeed names in general.
I understand that my name is Elvis, and that other people
in this world (both dead and alive) are also called Elvis. But is
my ‘Elvis name’ the same ‘Elvis name’ as (for example)
Mr. Presley or Mr. Costello, or is it possibly my own unique
special ‘Elvis name’?
Perhaps not all Elvis’s or ‘Elva’ are the same
(After all, the ball in football is not the same as the ball in
Cinderella’s ball).Or is the Elvis that we three (for example)
share exactly the same Elvis, a sort of ideal of Elvis?
Maybe some sort of undefined Elvisness!
A kind of denotation of Elvisness, while my own personal
Elvis is nothing but a connotative idea of
Elvisness.
This may not seem to be very important to you. But I
happen to think this is very significant. After all the naming of
anything is a very major event.
So therefore it is quite apparent that calling me Elvis
is very significant. In the end it is the ‘me’ that is being
named Elvis. But the main problem with the continuation of this
line of thought is that it leads to yet more
questions.
For example: -
Has anything else been done to me, by the naming of me
Elvis?
What does it mean to me to be Elvis?
What does it mean to me to be an Elvis?
What does it mean to me to be named Elvis against my
will?
Am I necessarily an Elvis or only contingently an
Elvis?
Would I still be me if I were called for example
Ralph?
What would happen if suppose, I changed my name to Ralph
and years later I were to visit my parents and told them that I
was Ralph?
Would they say “no, no, no, you’re not Ralph look at that birthmark on your butt, you’re Elvis, we’d recognize you anywhere man! “
.
It happened just a few nights ago.
I’d been down the pub for the
evening.
When I got back home, my flat had been
burgled.
This was indeed a tragedy.
Not only that, but my collection of words had been
broken into.
.
Abandon was missing.
So was multitude.
And consequence lay broken on the floor.
.
So I kicked shit under the sofa, burned obscenity
and called the police.
.
They were very nice about it all, carefully listing
all my stolen words.
They even offered me some of their own.
But as I said to the nice officer.
“What’s the use of a brand new loitering, when your nice-old incongruous is all smashed to pieces? “
.
Psycho?
Psycho?
Me?
I
feel creepy tonight.
I
wonder what’s wrong.
The
night is cold.
The
night is dark.
There’s music in the air.
The
night feels like a snake that has twisted itself inside
out.
I
feel creepy tonight.
I
wonder what is wrong.
The
night is cold.
The
night is dark.
There’s music in the air.
I
look over my shoulder.
Grin - flash.
Grin - flash.
Grin - flash.
Frown.
Alfred Hitchcock, move over.
How to rid yourself of pretensions.
Lesson one.
#1. Start by collecting your
thoughts.
#2. When your collection is complete. Sell them to
the highest bidder.
#3. Spend the money.
